Ah, Say Yes to the Dress. The show sparked a phenomenon of watching brides make the most personal decision of their wedding planning time along with all their entourage and (sometimes) drama. Do you love reality tv? Some I do and some I hate, but it tends to draw me in. I had my stints of watching Say Yes to the Dress and am just in love with it, drama and all. First, I watched Kleinfelds’ version, with New York brides and grandiose budgets, and when Bridals by Lori joined the schedule, I was beside myself. See, I’m from Georgia, and my sister in law actually bought her dress there and graciously included me on her trip. We were there before it was cool (wink).
Fast forward about 15 years and I am preparing to be the Mother of the Bride. Gulp. Our second daughter is planning her wedding for June, and I have wanted to document it here for information and safe keeping, but it is almost too much for me to process. I hope to keep y’all in the loop better as we progress, but this was something that stuck out to me, and I knew what I wanted to say. We had our first dress experience this past weekend.
I was anxious about our appointment at the big box bridal store. We were going as a fact finding mission for size and style, and weren’t really planning on purchasing that day. My anxiety? That she would find THE ONE and love it. Silly huh? Isn’t that what you should WANT? Sometimes I have commitment issues. LOL. I guess I should explain more. You see, I didn’t have that head-over-heels-ring-the-bell-everybody-cried moment. We saw a dress that caught our eye in a bridal show fashion show, found a store that had it, went to a snooty store (in a mall no less!) to try it on, and said, “This would work.” Really? This’ll do? That’s it? I went to my bridal store I was working with where I had purchased my prom and formal dresses for years, and they graciously ordered it with no obligation. Went in to try on for the second time, and yep, “It works.”
How did it go this weekend? My sweet bride-daughter found a dress. What was her reaction? Calmly, “I like this one the most so far.” To be fair, one bridesmaid cried (there’s always one!), but her momma didn’t. She didn’t. I had her turn and noticed the details and told her she was beautiful. Did we get it? No, not on this visit. She did say she wanted to look some more to be sure. Fortunately, she was not disappointed to not have a moment. She really didn’t expect it from herself. Honestly, I wasn’t sure I would either – but neither one of us were real sure what we would do. This is all new territory!
Why tell this story? I really want to encourage brides. As a wedding photographer and the Mother of the Bride, I want to say, it’s okay not to have a grandiose moment. It’s okay to be slow and calculating. You haven’t missed out on something. If you have that moment, that is wonderful to have that sureness and marker in this engagement journey. If you don’t, it is still just as special of a dress. You are still the bride and the most important woman in the room. You are stunning in your dress because you chose it, no matter what reason. Be true to yourself in style and process and don’t compare yourself to others. Love your story because it’s yours.
What was your dress choosing story?
